AROWS Age Related Ovarian Wastage Syndrome

The Executive Director of the Women’s Bioethics Center for Age Related Ovarian Wastage Syndrome announced the birth of a new Blog today. Fanning herself with the notebook whipped from the hand of a startled young reporter, the flushed E.D. renewed her organization’s pledge to take its “rightful place in the big tote bag of bioethics funding and activism.”

While the organization has traditionally been tied up in the study of patterns of acquisition and use of estrogen to control pre-, peri-, and post- AROWSal symptoms, the E.D. stressed that women of a certain age have broad interests in other aspects of bioethics, including enhancement, regenerative medicine, and general health issues.

Age Related Ovarian Wastage Syndrome is the condition of all women who live long enough. It is a shame that this unique stage of our life is called “menopause.”
Peri-AROWS-al women have always supported the practical applications of enhancement therapies, reproductive technologies, and longevity studies and medicine. While we keep a stiff upper lip, it is time that the public eye is opened in order to raise awareness of our contributions that go far beyond the purchase of hormones, aesthetics such as plastic surgery and botox, and pushing the age of childbearing to new limits. We have been the subjects of numerous studies concerning heart disease, osteoporosis, and the treatment of AROWS, itself.
However, we have not been given – we have not demanded – the same attention as a group that has been given to the prolife, prochoice, neocons, and progressives. It is past time for recognition of the considerable bulk of contributions to the field of bioethics.
We’re your first wives and mothers, we know where the pill bottles are hidden!”

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